#4 “ ……我 們 的 軟 弱……”

“況 且 我 們 的 軟 弱 有 聖 靈 幫 助 ， 我 們 本 不 曉 得 當 怎 樣 禱 告 ， 只 是 聖 靈 親 自 用 說 不 出 來 的 歎 息 替 我 們 禱 告 。” 羅 馬 書 8:26

親愛的主，

當我看到「軟弱」這個詞時，我的自然反應是畏縮、隱藏或假裝。這是我面對自己敵人的時刻。我傾向於聳聳肩，假裝我可以應付發生的任何事情。主啊，在軟弱的時候，我知道祢真正希望我禱告什麼嗎？我真的知道堅強不代表沒有破碎或傷害嗎？

主啊，謝謝祢讓我回想起過去的傷痛和破碎；我甚至早上都無法起床，更不用說祈禱了。然而，一次又一次，你在我的軟弱中出現，就像十字架一樣，羞恥的標誌變成了戰勝罪惡和死亡的標誌。我的軟弱成了我親身經歷你的地方. 我依稀記得，當我在養育孩子的旅途中，在與身體疾病的鬥爭中感到如此孤獨時，我聽到了你溫柔的呢喃，聖靈的呻吟嘆息。是你在我的軟弱出現了。

所以，軟弱其實是我自己的缺乏、我的無助、我的痛苦為你改造我的靈修生活所創造的沃土、空間。

主啊，雖然我常常討厭看見自己的軟弱，面對自己的罪和無助，但我願意將我心中的這片土壤奉獻給你，讓你在我裡面成長，豐富我，使我結出屬靈的果子。 阿門

“…in our weakness…..”

“And the Holy Spirit helps us in our weakness. For example, we don’t know what God wants us to pray for. But the Holy Spirit prays for us with groanings that cannot be expressed in words.”

Rom 8:26 NLT

Dear Lord,

When I see the word “weakness”, my natural response is to cringe, hide or pretend. It is a moment that I face my own enemy. I tend to shrug it off pretending that I can handle whatever comes. In times of weakness, do I know what you really want me to pray, Lord? Do I really know coming out strong doesn’t mean no brokenness or hurt?

Lord, thank you for bringing to me memories of my past hurts and brokenness; the time of weakness that I could not even get up in the morning, let alone to pray. Yet, time and again, you show up in my weakness, just like the cross as a sign of shame has become a sign of victory over sin and death. I faintly remember the time I heard your gentle whisper, your spirit’s groanings, when I felt so alone in my parenting journey and battle with physical illness. It was you who showed up in my weakness.

So, weakness is actually a fertile soil, a space, created by my own lacking, my helplessness and my suffering for you to transform my spiritual life.

Lord, even though I often resent being weak, being confronted with my own sinfulness and helplessness, I want to offer this piece of soil in my heart for you to grow in me, to enrich me and to yield the fruits of the spirit. Amen